Giftedness In Children - Our Experience With 3 Gifted Sons
I wasn't going to talk about this here. I've debated if I should. But it's getting harder to share parts of my parenting journey with you without sharing the context that so much of my experience is affected by. Context that would explain some of the extreme behaviors I've mentioned, or why we've seen specialists. So for better or worse, here it is.
I noticed my son was different during his first year, but didn't know what was going on. His first assessment was just before his 2nd birthday. It was for autism, and it came back negative. Just after his 4th birthday he was tested again. This time it was positive… for giftedness. In some areas, profoundly gifted.
I have a gifted child. Infact I have more than one.
It has (thankfully) become socially acceptable to tell others your child has autism, or ADHD, or any other neuro-diverse diagnosis. The response is usually met with compassion. But giftedness? Well now you're just bragging.
But we're not.
For most people they imagine an adult-like, 3 year old piano playing prodigy. Or a perfectly behaved, straight A student. Or a successful genius celebrity like Elon Musk. I know that's what I thought.
While it's not the same for everyone, our experience has been very different. There's a reason why we tested for autism first.
A gifted mind is usually wired to process information very quickly. The large amount of input is experienced more intensely, and the corresponding emotional response is usually extreme.
Combine that with a toddler mind, not capable of emotional regulation. In simple terms, it means BIG feelings, BIG behaviors, and massive meltdowns. When they aren't overwhelmed, insatiable curiosity, severe boredom, and impatience dominate. Cue feelings of deep inadequacy and shame as a parent, knowing you're both being judged.
As they mature, intense social, emotional, and educational challenges lie ahead. These are the years we're in now.
Yes, my kiddos are very capable in a number of areas. It's amazing to watch. I love that I get to be their wingman in all the extreme ups and downs they go through. I've learned so much through it all and I look forward to sharing it with you, now with context.
I noticed my son was different during his first year, but didn't know what was going on. His first assessment was just before his 2nd birthday. It was for autism, and it came back negative. Just after his 4th birthday he was tested again. This time it was positive… for giftedness. In some areas, profoundly gifted.
I have a gifted child. Infact I have more than one.
It has (thankfully) become socially acceptable to tell others your child has autism, or ADHD, or any other neuro-diverse diagnosis. The response is usually met with compassion. But giftedness? Well now you're just bragging.
But we're not.
For most people they imagine an adult-like, 3 year old piano playing prodigy. Or a perfectly behaved, straight A student. Or a successful genius celebrity like Elon Musk. I know that's what I thought.
While it's not the same for everyone, our experience has been very different. There's a reason why we tested for autism first.
A gifted mind is usually wired to process information very quickly. The large amount of input is experienced more intensely, and the corresponding emotional response is usually extreme.
Combine that with a toddler mind, not capable of emotional regulation. In simple terms, it means BIG feelings, BIG behaviors, and massive meltdowns. When they aren't overwhelmed, insatiable curiosity, severe boredom, and impatience dominate. Cue feelings of deep inadequacy and shame as a parent, knowing you're both being judged.
As they mature, intense social, emotional, and educational challenges lie ahead. These are the years we're in now.
Yes, my kiddos are very capable in a number of areas. It's amazing to watch. I love that I get to be their wingman in all the extreme ups and downs they go through. I've learned so much through it all and I look forward to sharing it with you, now with context.