Comparison Is The Thief Of Joy
Imagine for a minute that we all live in tents. The tents provide very nicely for our needs and are the only shelter we've ever known. We love our tents.
Then one day, workers come to our tent community and build an apartment complex right in the middle of it. Each unit has a bedroom, small kitchen, and bathroom. With electricity and indoor plumbing, these apartment units seem like palaces.
The catch... there are only 10 units.
By some miracle, you and your family are selected to live in one of the coveted, new homes. The 5 of you move in and look out the window to a clear view of your tent neighbors all around you. They're looking up, wishing they'd been chosen.
You can't believe your luck.
A month passes and you have a new skip to your step. You hold your head a little higher when you go out to get your groceries, and you can't help but feel bad for everyone still living in tents.
Another month passes and the workers return. This time they construct beautiful single family homes for all the remaining tent dwellers.
Seeing these homes pop up like weeds all around your apartment makes you feel a little sick. They move into their homes and you start telling your family to keep the windows closed because the smell of their bbq'ing and the sound of their laughter agitates you.
You see people walk past your little apartment on their way to get groceries. Their heads are held a little higher, and you realize that they're probably feeling sorry for you.
The sick feeling returns.
*
When I heard a version of this story for the first time it had a significant impact on me that I haven't forgotten.
Just like your mom used to tell you, there's always going to be someone else who has more than you. There will be other kids that are smarter or better behaved than yours. Other homes that are bigger and cleaner. Other moms who seem to be doing it all and you're just surviving day to day.
The problem isn't you or your circumstance, it's the comparison.
So do yourself and your family a huge favour. Choose to disengage from the nonsense of trying to have and be more than others, and live in the joy of your life.
Because comparison is the thief of joy.
Then one day, workers come to our tent community and build an apartment complex right in the middle of it. Each unit has a bedroom, small kitchen, and bathroom. With electricity and indoor plumbing, these apartment units seem like palaces.
The catch... there are only 10 units.
By some miracle, you and your family are selected to live in one of the coveted, new homes. The 5 of you move in and look out the window to a clear view of your tent neighbors all around you. They're looking up, wishing they'd been chosen.
You can't believe your luck.
A month passes and you have a new skip to your step. You hold your head a little higher when you go out to get your groceries, and you can't help but feel bad for everyone still living in tents.
Another month passes and the workers return. This time they construct beautiful single family homes for all the remaining tent dwellers.
Seeing these homes pop up like weeds all around your apartment makes you feel a little sick. They move into their homes and you start telling your family to keep the windows closed because the smell of their bbq'ing and the sound of their laughter agitates you.
You see people walk past your little apartment on their way to get groceries. Their heads are held a little higher, and you realize that they're probably feeling sorry for you.
The sick feeling returns.
*
When I heard a version of this story for the first time it had a significant impact on me that I haven't forgotten.
Just like your mom used to tell you, there's always going to be someone else who has more than you. There will be other kids that are smarter or better behaved than yours. Other homes that are bigger and cleaner. Other moms who seem to be doing it all and you're just surviving day to day.
The problem isn't you or your circumstance, it's the comparison.
So do yourself and your family a huge favour. Choose to disengage from the nonsense of trying to have and be more than others, and live in the joy of your life.
Because comparison is the thief of joy.